Every parent wants the best for their child. Including having a strong mentality, one of them. Especially now that children live in an era that is increasingly full of challenges.
Unfortunately, parents often do not realize that the care they do has an impact on the mental development of children. Incorrect parenting can make children mentally weak. Then, what kind of parenting can make children mentally weak or even damage their self-confidence?
Here are mistakes of parents that destroy the confidence and mental strength of children:
1. Do not stop children from making mistakes
It is difficult for many parents to see the child’s mistakes and not come in to solve the problem, many parents react to prevent the child’s mistakes just before he takes action. While preventing the child from making a mistake takes away the opportunity for the child to learn and diminishes his experiences.
Mistakes are the biggest teachers of life. Whether they are on the football field or a math test, they all increase the child’s experience. Each of these mistakes is a valuable opportunity for children to build the mental strength they need to do better next time.
2. Teach children how to cope with emotions
Sometimes children, like adults, can be sad, angry, and aggressive. But how parents react to children’s emotions has a huge impact on the development of their emotional intelligence and self-esteem.
One of the mistakes parents make is not educating the child enough about coping with his or her emotions. You need to help children understand their feelings and teach them how to react appropriately to those feelings. By doing this, you will teach children how to deal with these feelings more confidently and more easily in the future.
3. Lack of negative mentality in the child
Saying things like “we can’t afford these shoes because we are poor and we don’t have enough money” reinforces the child’s perception that living conditions are out of his control.
Instead of allowing your children to exaggerate their poverty and misery, encourage them to take positive action. For example, provide them with a piggy bank to save money on and use it to provide some of their necessities. By doing this, the child will appreciate the money and resources at his disposal and will have more confidence in his ability to create a better future for himself.
Therapists say that this is one of the most frequent mistakes in today’s society. Parents take on many tasks for their children, study with them, excuse them to the teacher, intervene before seeing them suffer the consequences of a bad decision, constantly tell them what to do, organize the whole family life around them, they avoid annoyances …
This overprotection is very pernicious because it makes citizens dependent and sometimes very tyrannical because they grow up thinking that the world revolves around them. That they are the kings of the house, not one more of the family. Overprotection makes people insecure, incapable of making decisions, and facing daily difficulties and setbacks. They do not know how to assume the consequences of their actions and self-esteem problems.
5. Do not listen to the child
When a child talks to his parents, you should listen to him with all your heart. Children like to have someone listen to them wholeheartedly. This type of behavior for the child is a pattern and modeling of behavior that the child uses in adulthood for his interactions. When the child is noticed when talking, the feeling is definitely conveyed to the child that he is an important character and valuable to others. This in itself increases the child’s self-confidence and self-esteem.
6. Do not make the child feel guilty about something
Remember that children learn from the first days of life everything they learn from your behavior and actions. If you treat the child empathetically and understand his feelings, he or she will do the same.
Let the children see and understand what good you are doing for others because they will probably imitate your actions. For example, show helping older people or helping neighbors. Use polite words. Praise others if they treat them well.
Parents’ mistakes can destroy confidence and mental strength in children. Studies have shown that children with confidence experience a variety of benefits from this feeling, including less anxiety, improved school performance, increased resilience, and healthier relationships.
If the parents do not know the correct methods of disciplining a child, it is necessary to consult an experienced psychologist and therapist in this regard and avoid unknowing actions.